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This article is about the graphic novel. For other uses, see Lost Girls (disambiguation) .Not to be confused with Lost Girl .Lost GirlsCover of Lost Girls singlevolume hardcover edition.Publication informationLost Girls is a graphic novel written by Alan Moore and illustrated by Melinda Gebbie , depicting the sexually explicit adventures of three female fictional characters of the late 19th and early 20th century: Alice from Lewis Carroll s Alices Adventures in Wonderland and Through the LookingGlass , Dorothy Gale from L. Frank Baum s The Wonderful Wizard of Oz , and Wendy Darling from J.M. Barrie s Peter and Wendy . They meet as adults in 1913 and describe and share some of their erotic adventures with each other.ContentsPlot summary edit Alice from Alices Adventures in Wonderland and Through the LookingGlass (now greyhaired, and called Lady Fairchild), Dorothy from The Wonderful Wizard of Oz (now in her 20s) and Wendy from Peter and Wendy (now in her 30s, and married to a man in his 50s named Harold Potter) are visiting the expensive mountain resort Hotel Himmelgarten in Austria on the eve of World War I (19131914). The women meet by chance and begin to exchange erotic stories from their pasts. The stories are based on the childhood fantasy worlds of the three women:Wendy Darling. Wendys sexual escapades begin when she meets a homeless teenage boy named Peter and his sister Annabel in Kensington Gardens . Peter follows the three siblings home and teaches them sexual games, and the siblings begin regular meetings with Peter and his group of homeless boys in the park for sex. These encounters are watched by The Captain , a coworker of Wendys father, who later hires Peter as a male prostitute and brutally rapes Annabel. He attacks Wendy, who escapes by confronting him with his fear of ageing. She only sees Peter once more, hustling in a train station. She marries the much older Harold Potter with whom she is sexually incompatible. The pair have a platonic marriage, and Wendy is able to repress her memories of sex.Dorothy Gale. While trapped in her house during a cyclone, she begins masturbating and experiences her first orgasm at the age of fifteen. She has sexual encounters with three farm hands whom she refers to as The Straw Man , The Cowardly Lion and The Tin Man . Throughout most of her stories, she refers to her aunt and uncle, whom she later admits were her stepmother and father, who discover her affairs. Her father takes her to New York City, under the pretense of seeking psychological help, but has sex with her repeatedly while they are in the city. Dorothy feels guilty for the pain they have caused her stepmother, and leaves to travel the world.Alice Fairchild. At fourteen, Alice is coerced into sex with her fathers friend, which she endures by staring into a mirror and imagining she is having sex with herself. At an allgirls boarding school, Alice convinces many of her schoolmates to sleep with her, and develops a strong attraction to her P.E. teacher, who offers Alice a job as a personal assistant (and sexual plaything) when she leaves employment at the school. Alices employer marries a Mr. Redman, but begins hosting extravagant, drugfuelled lesbian sex parties . Alice becomes addicted to opium, and watches a young girl named Lily, among many others, abused just as she was. When Lily is instructed by Mrs. Redman to secretly perform cunnilingus on Alice under the table during a dinner party, Alice exposes her employers secrets to the guests. Mrs. Redman has Alice declared insane, and she is put into a mental hospital where she is systematically raped by the staff. Upon release Alice resumes her very active sex life and drug use. Disowned by her family, she moves to Africa to run a familyowned diamond mine.In addition to the three womens erotic flashbacks, the graphic novel depicts sexual encounters between the women and other guests and staff of the hotel. The erotic adventures are set against the backdrop of unsettling cultural and historic events of the period, such as the debut of Igor Stravinsky s The Rite of Spring and the assassination of Archduke Franz Ferdinand of Austria . The graphic novel ends with Alices mirror being destroyed by German soldiers who burn down the Hotel.Literary significance and reception edit Moore is one of the most critically acclaimed writers in the field of comic books, and the release of this work received widespread coverage in the industry media. Despite the price of US75, the books first two print runs of 10,000 each sold out at the distributor level on the day of their release, with the US sales at the end of 2007 reaching 35,000 copies. 1Controversy about child sexuality edit In the US and Canada, many retailers have stated that they will not stock the book out of fear of possible obscenity need quotation to verify prosecution, though some said they might make the book available to their customers via special order and simply not stock it. 2In Canada, the Canada Border Services Agency (CBSA) initially seized a copy of the book citing obscenity, and Top Shelf ceased its import from the UK. 3 4 However, after an appeal was made to the agency by the publisher, 3 5 the Senior Program Advisor of the Prohibited Importations Unit of CBSA approved entry of the book stating in a letter, these depictions are integral to the development of an intricate, imaginative and artfully rendered storyline, and, the portrayal of sex is necessary to a wider artistic and literary purpose. 6 7 8Moore states that the storm of criticism which he and Gebbie expected did not materialise, which he attributes in part to his design of Lost Girls as a benign form of pornography (he cites people like Angela Carter who, in her book The Sadeian Women ... admitted... the possibility of a form of pornography that was benign, that was imaginative, was beautiful, and which didnt have the problems that she saw in a lot of other pornography 9 as inspirations for the work). He has also said that his own description of Lost Girls as pornography 10 has wrongfooted a lot of... people. 9 Moore speculates that if wed have come out and said, well, this is a work of art, they would have probably all said, no its not, its pornography. So because were saying, this is pornography, theyre saying, no its not, its art, and people dont realise quite what theyve said. 9In the UK, graphic artists and publishers feared that the book could be illegal to possess under the Coroners and Justice Act , which criminalises any sexual image depicting a child, defined as anyone appearing under the age of 18. 11 The book was nonetheless approved and continues to be published in the UK.Disputed copyright status edit On 23 June 2006, officials for Great Ormond Street Hospital which was given the copyright to Peter Pan by J.M. Barrie in 1929asserted that Moore would need their permission to publish the book in the UK and Europe. Moore indicated that he would not be seeking their licence, claiming that he had not expected his work to be banned and that the hospital only holds the rights to performances of the original play, not to the individual characters. On 11 October 2006, Top Shelf signed an agreement with GOSH that did not concede copyright infringement, but delayed publication of Lost Girls in the UK until after the copyright lapsed at the end of 2007.Allusions and references edit The title of the work is a play on the name for Peter Pans followers, the Lost Boys .The individual sections dealing with the three titular girls all have distinct visual layouts and themes used for their chapters. Alices sections feature ovals reminiscent of her lookingglass Wendys are shrouded in tall, dark rectangles reminiscent of the shadowy Victorian architecture of her time, and Dorothy has wide panels in imitation of the flat landscape of Kansas and prominently featured silver shoes. 12Moore attempts to tailor the dialogue to each characters previous experiences and stories. Dorothy Gale, raised on a farm, speaks in a casual Midwestern American dialect. Wendys speeches are heavy with timidity and clumsiness as a result of the repressive nature of her middleclass upbringing. Alice, having briefly been made queen (in Through The LookingGlass And What Alice Found There), is more authoritarian in her upperclass English speech patterns and formal manner. Lewis Carroll s nonsensewords also make allusory appearances in Alices dialogue, including phrases such as to jab and bandersnatch as well as more overt references to her adventures in phrases like the reflection is the real thing and I made pretence. 13Each of the three Lost Girls volumes opens with a quotation from the three original authors ( Lewis Carroll , J. M. Barrie , L. Frank Baum ). Parts of these citations are used as titles for each book:First volume: Older Children (We are but older children, dear, who fret to find our bedtime near, Carroll.)Second volume: Neverlands (Of course, the Neverlands vary a good deal, Barrie.)Third volume: The Great And Terrible (I am Oz, the great and terrible. Who are you and why do you seek me?, Baum.)Equally, the titles of each chapter naturally point towards the three original authors books: The Mirror, Silver Shoes, Missing Shadows, A Vice From a Caterpillar, Which Dreamed It?, The Cowardly Lion, You Wont Forget to Wave?, Queens Together, Snicker Snack, etc.Each volume has ten chapters, and each chapter contains eight pages. This format initially derived from its original serialised publication in Stephen R. Bissette s anthology Taboo , but it also reflects Carrolls multilayered usage of mathematical allusions and links as there are 8 squares in the length of a chess board (a prominent feature of Through The LookingGlass, and the key to becoming a queen in both game and book) as well as his poem The Hunting of the Snark being An Agony In Eight Fits.The regular chapters are interspersed with pornographic pastiches of works by artists and authors of the period, presented as chapters in Monsieur Rougeurs White Book, a collection of illustrated pornographic stories. Each chapter is in the style of different authors and artists of the period: these include presentations in the styles of Colette and Aubrey Beardsley , Guillaume Apollinaire and Alfons Mucha , Oscar Wilde and Egon Schiele , and Pierre Lous and Franz von Bayros . 14 15 16(Although the central characters and various supporting characters are based directly on preexisting fictional characters, Harold Potter is not a reference to Harry Potter , having been named years before J. K. Rowling s first book was published.) 17Literary themes edit Moore describes the work as pornography, 18 a genre whose literary and artistic quality he and Gebbie hope to raise:Certainly it seemed to us Moore and Gebbie that sex, as a genre, was woefully underrepresented in literature. Every other field of human experienceeven rarefied ones like detective, spaceman or cowboyhave got whole genres dedicated to them. Whereas the only genre in which sex can be discussed is a disreputable, seamy, underthecounter genre with absolutely no standards: the pornography industrywhich is a kind of Bollywood for hip, sleazy ugliness.Publication history edit The first six chapters of Lost Girls were initially published in the Taboo anthology magazine, beginning in 1991 with Taboo 5. 19 20 21 Kitchen Sink Press s Tundra imprint later reprinted the Taboo chapters as two separate volumes, containing all of the previouslypublished chapters. 22 A tenissue series was scheduled at one point, but Moore and Gebbie instead decided to take the time to finish it, then offer it to various companies as a finished product. Eventually Top Shelf was selected as the publisher, and at one point the finished product was meant to be released in late 2003 or early 2004. Top Shelf later planned to debut it in the United States at the 2005 San Diego ComicCon , but due to graphic design taking longer than anticipated, it was released at the July 2006 convention instead. In the UK the book was published on 1 January 2008, and launched by Moore and Gebbie at a book launch in London on 2 January.The original threevolume slipcase edition of Lost Girls was replaced in summer 2009 by a singlevolume edition. 23Lost Girls SingleVolume Edition by Alan Moore and Melinda Gebbie , Top Shelf , August 2009 ISBN 9781603090445 )Over the course of the books sixteenyear production, Moore and Gebbie entered into a romantic relationship, and in 2005 they announced their engagement to be married. Id recommend to anybody working on their relationship that they should try embarking on a 16year elaborate pornography together, joked Moore. I think theyll find it works wonders. 24Moore originally planned to write in his usual style, producing a lengthy script from which Gebbie would work, but after some initial attempts they decided to collaborate much more closely. So, she would construct the pages of artwork from my incoherent thumbnail sketches and then I would put the dialogue in afterwards. 25Lost Girls was published on online magazine on The First Post in 2008. 26Interviews edit The DVD of the documentary feature film The Mindscape of Alan Moore contains an exclusive bonus interview with Gebbie, elaborately detailing the origin of the book and the collaboration with Moore.
Type keyword(s) to search43 Girls Get Real About Their First Time Having SexAfterwards, I expected to feel more mature and more confident, but I really just felt the same as I always have.Jan 25, 2018Getty ImagesThanks to Hollywoods unrealistic standards, weve all built up this imaginary idea of what sex is supposed to be like. But the truth is, everyones experience is different. Sometimes its smooth and romantic, and other times, its kind of terrible.But no matter how old you are or what the circumstances are, having sex for the first time can feel like a huge deal! Below, 43 girls get real about the first time they had sex how they knew they were ready, who they did it with, and how they felt afterward.Advertisement Continue Reading Below1. He knew I was a virgin and for some reason, I had this expectation of it being magical, which in all honesty, it wasnt. He kept his face buried in my shoulderneck the whole time and asked if I was okay once during, which I thought was kind of inconsiderate. I think I would have enjoyed it more if he had checked in with me to see if my needs were being met, which they werent. At the time, I was blinded by my love, so I chose to look past that. Hafeezah, 222. It was not romantic at all. It was messy, drunk and horny. I was 17, drunk at a beach concert, called a guy that we had an on and off thing and we had sex in the back of his pickup car. Then, he went to study abroad and we never spoke about it, until like 2 years later. Bianca, 233. I was a sophomore in high school and at a Halloween party. I got pretty drunk and had sex with one of my childhood friends (on his birthday) in the basement of his house. Then, the next day, I found out one of my best friends also had sex for the first time that night. So to this day, she and I will text each other on October 30 to say happy anniversary. Tory, 244. We were 17 and we needed a time when our parents werent home, so we waited until Christmas Eve when his parents had left for a holiday party. I was so incredibly nervous l think we both were. So we lit candles and took it slow. To be honest it hurt like hell. But other than that l think it was pretty perfect as far as virgins go. Debby, 225. It was after homecoming and we were just in his room. It all happened pretty naturally. It wasnt painful, but it honestly didnt feel like anything at all was happening. And then a 12 minutes later it was over. Jasmyne, 21Advertisement Continue Reading Below6. I was 17 when I first had sex. I lost my virginity to someone I actually cared about, which doesnt mean much to me looking back now, but it was important to me back then. It was late at night and we were in the backseat of his car. I was really nervous, but he was patient and managed to make me feel comfortable and sexy, even. I dont regret anything and for that Im thankful. Jennifer, 227. It was nothing like I imagined. I felt comfortable, but out of nowhere, I got really nervous. He told me to relax and that we didnt have to continue if I didnt want to, but I did. It was very painful to the point that I had to stop because I was in so much pain. I felt a little ashamed and embarrassed because I imaged something different and I thought he was disappointed in the experience. He was so understanding and he said it was fine and that he wanted me to be okay, and that we didnt have to continue. He made me feel better about the experience, and we are still together two and a half years later. Katie, 248. I wasnt in love or whatever, but I guess I never expected to be. He made me feel comfortable and respected, so one night, I went over and we had sex. It wasnt awkward or weird, and it wasnt this special magical moment either. We went to a diner the next morning for breakfast and texted my best friend group chat the link to Lonelys Islands I Just Had Sex, and I think they were more excited about it than me to be honest. Tiffany, 219. Truthfully, it wasnt enjoyable. I wasnt ready at all and he was. And then it sort of just happened to me rather than me choosing whether or not I wanted to. Alex, 2210. I was on senior week, and I was hanging out with the boy I liked. His friend was asleep in his hotel room, so we did it on the balcony. It was completely unplanned, but Ive never regretted it. Im still friends with the guy, too. Kelsey, 23Advertisement Continue Reading BelowAdvertisement Continue Reading Below11. It was the summer after high school for me, sort of an in the heat of the moment type of situation with this guy Id been talking to for a while. Surprisingly, it wasnt uncomfortable. It didnt hurt or anything like Id expected, which was interesting! Anumeha, 2112. My first time was with my boyfriend of a few months. I was 19. After class, I hung out with my boyfriend at his house (he lives with his parents). Later, I snuck back in after his parents fell asleep. It was super unexpected and definitely not planned. I know that I was ready to have sex, but the nervousness of being COMPLETELY NUDE in front of my boyfriend for the first time PLUS being in his house when I wasnt supposed to be made it hard for me to let myself really feel good. I didnt necessarily feel bad, and I definitely dont regret any of it, the circumstances just made it hard for me to let go and loosen up. Thinking back to it eight months and many sexy times later, I honestly wouldnt change anything. Ive grown so much more comfortable with sex, and I can thank my boyfriend for that for being kind and gentle. Maggie, 1913. My mom tried to have an open and honest conversation about having sex so that I would feel less nervous when the time came. But the conversation was always about boys, never about being sexual with girls, so I felt completely unprepared when I went to have sex with my girlfriend for the first time. Brooklyn, 2214. I was 18 and I kinda just wanted to get it over with. It was the summer after I graduated from high school and I was on a date with this kid I knew since elementary school. We had talked about it before and we got this cheap motel and we did it. I felt kinda numb until the next morning, when I got in the shower and cried for an hour. Ari, 21Advertisement Continue Reading Below15. I lost my virginity at 14. It wasnt a big deal in my mind, as Id lose it one day anyway, so why not then? I was talking to the boy for awhile and he made me feel like it was the right thing to do. I imagined itd be like in the movies all sweet and romantic, all planned out. It wasnt! It was awkward and I didnt really know what to do. Since then, my experiences have gotten better as I now know what Im doing. Jenna, 1716. I was 17 and my best friend was a 21yearold guy. We always joked about marriage, and he was cute, but I never felt attracted to him. One day, we went hiking, and he kissed me at the top of the peak, and I felt excited. He was older, his arms were strong, and he wasnt aggressive like the boys I kissed in my grade. He was my best friend and we were kissing what!!! Anyway, that summer, we talked about having sex, but he insisted that I had to be 18. Finally, my birthday came, and his family was home, so we snuck into his backyard and went into a childrens playhouse adorned with little kitchenware and dolls. So not sexy. It was awkward and it didnt really work. He blamed me for it. It was really immature. Also, after having sex with guys, Ive realized that sex with girls is more my speed more fun. Naomi, 2117. I was 16 years old and it was right after I went on a hike with my boyfriend. I had always been nervous about the idea of sex. I had so many questions about how it would feel. But we discussed it and we both agreed we trusted each other fully. At first, it felt weird not painful, but just a completely different feeling. My advice is to make sure you trust this person so you can enjoy it even if it is awkward at first. Carina, 19Advertisement Continue Reading BelowAdvertisement Continue Reading Below18. I wanted to have sex before college because I didnt want my first time to be a onenight stand after a party. I had met this guy online when I was younger and we had been talking for awhile. I had gone to see him a couple times and he said he didnt want to be my first. But then on New Years Eve, he invited me over and we ended up having sex. I felt super weird after, because I was like, maybe I shouldve waited for someone I loved. I really think that shapes how I treat sex now. I know a lot of people whose first time was with someone they loved, and now sex is this sacred thing for them whereas for me, sex is really just an act of pleasure. Phoebe, 2319. I was 18 and in a longdistance relationship. My boyfriend was visiting and it felt right at the time. But then he had to leave to go back to school, and I was left with a lot of emotions, including regret and shame. I missed him and I felt overwhelmed. Even though we arent dating anymore, I really did love him and a part of me always will. Sammy, 1820. I was 16. My boyfriend at the time and I had been together for about eight months and things were getting serious, so we decided to do it. I was expecting it to be so nice and amazing, but instead it was so painful. It only lasted a couple of seconds. Katelyn, 2021. I had been dating a guy for less than a month when he told me, We need to have sex so we can figure out if we have a spark to continue dating. I was 18 and wanted to lose my virginity so I could fit in, but also because I really liked this guy. We had sex in a car (how romantic, right?). I was so nervous that he wouldnt feel that spark, but he did. At the time, I felt amazing. I thought I found the guy of my dreams and that wed get married. Were no longer together, but I dont regret the experience. I just wished I had known I didnt need to have sex with a guy for him to approve of me or continue dating me. Mikayla, 20Advertisement Continue Reading Below22. I love my boyfriend and I was ready, so we had sex. Im on the Pill and we used condoms. It didnt hurt at all. I was so happy to be making love with him. I liked the feeling of being so close to him. But physically I thought it felt weird like it didnt really feel all that great and I didnt feel tons of pleasure. Afterwards, I expected to feel more mature and more confident, but I really just felt the same as I always have. I dont really feel like losing your virginity is as big of a deal as everyone makes it out to be. Im happy that I had my first time with someone I love, so, in that aspect, losing my virginity was really great because of how much I love my boyfriend. Krista, 1923. I lost it when I was 14 on my boyfriends brothers futon and I bled all over the pristine white comforter. If it had been with anyone other than my boyfriend it would have been sooo embarrassing. Kelsey, 2224. I had a group of friends over on a Friday night my first semester of college. One friend asked if he could crash at my place. I wasnt expecting it to turn into anything I didnt even know he felt attracted to me that way. It was very spur of the moment, but we did use a condom. He was my good friend and I trusted him, so even though we didnt talk about it beforehand, it felt right and okay and was even pretty exciting. Beatrice, 1925. At 17, I was convinced I was the very last virgin in college. I was obsessed with the fact that I was a virgin, sizing up my classmates, puzzling over whether any of them were virgins, too. One of my high school crushes invited me to hang out one weekend, and according to my experienced roommate, it was apparent that he wanted to have sex. We used protection. He was considerate and gentle and quite kind. The experience as a whole was very positive. I didnt have sex again for another two and a half years. I was ready and glad to no longer be a virgin, but I was not ready for the risk and responsibility of being sexually active. I have no regrets either about how I lost my virginity or how long it took me to have sex again, because both were a reflection of me being good and ready. Chloe, 22Advertisement Continue Reading BelowAdvertisement Continue Reading Below26. I lost my virginity when I was 15 to my boyfriend who was 17 at the time. We decided to do it after about three months of dating, when I knew for sure I was ready. We used a condom. Honestly, I didnt feel different after than I did before. Maybe just a little more mature. If you really think youre ready, and you and your partner protect yourselves, it can be a really cool thing. Kayleigh, 1727. Though I was an early bloomer when it came to kissing and dating, I was 20 when I lost my virginity. I decided that I wanted to wait until college to lose it, but when I finally got to college, I didnt really meet anyone that I wanted to have sex with, especially not for my first time. I ultimately decided to lose it to a guy that I really, really liked but wasnt in a relationship with. I was just so ready to get it over with, and this guy was (and still is) a great guy. My one regret in the entire experience is that I didnt tell him that I was a virgin. To this day he doesnt know! I was so scared that I was going to freak him out, but really, a lot of awkwardness could have been avoided if Id just been honest. Shannon, 2228. Id always thought I would wait until marriage, but the older I got, the bigger the fuss about sex got. I was 17 and I just wanted to get it over with. I asked one of the people that knew me best at the time, my sortof boyfriend, if he would take my virginity, and he agreed. We used condoms. At first, we couldnt find the hole, but eventually, we did. Afterwards, I didnt feel much different. Alby, 1829. I lost my virginity to my boyfriend of 11 months when I was 16. He was two years older than me and not a virgin, and he had been trying to persuade me for a couple months beforehand. When we finally did have sex, it was when I was ready. I was glad that I didnt give in until I was really ready. It was painful and slightly awkward. I had this weird feeling of elation once it was over, though, because I had always wondered what it would be like, and it had finally happened. Ive never had any real regrets about the person I experienced it with or how it went down. (Although I will say it would have been better in a bed and not in the passenger seat of a Honda Civic...) Andi, 21Advertisement Continue Reading Below30. I guess it was two or three months into my relationship with my first girlfriend when I was 15. There wasnt one specific moment when it happened. It was more of a progression from one stage to the next rather than heres the moment I lost my virginity because were both girls. I was excited and nervous and happy about the whole thing. Sophie, 1731. When I was 17, I had this guy friend who I had been friends with for a while. We were both virgins and just wanted to get it over with. It wasnt pleasurable or even fun, and throughout the entire process all I could think about was, when will this be over? Moral of the story wait until youre really ready. Lee, 2232. My first time sucked. It was during my freshman year of college with an upperclassman frat bro. Wed been talking for months and I was convinced he liked me, though looking back on it now, his texts of What are you doing tonight? werent so much him liking me as they were him just wanting to get into my pants. Although he was relatively sweet to me during it, it still hurt like a btch and I got nothing out of it. At all. What stung the most was what happened after. He didnt text me at all and when I saw him at a party the next weekend he completely avoided me. If I walked into a room and we made eye contact he would immediately turn and walk out. It felt like a huge slap in the face. I liked him, but he had finally gotten what he wanted and that was it. He was over me. I wanted nothing more than to go up to him and yell and ask him why he was being so mean to me when I had done nothing wrong, but every weekend he would completely avoid me or be talking with another girl when I walked by. I have to admit that Im still not 100 over it or him. Cassidy, 19Advertisement Continue Reading BelowAdvertisement Continue Reading Below33. I was 17 and had been dating a guy for about two months. I knew I wanted to sleep with him. I thought about it for about a week to be sure, but I knew I was ready. I brought it up first, but quickly added that if he didnt want to yet, we could wait. He immediately said he wanted to, but asked about five times if I was sure I was ready, making sure I knew that he wouldnt care if I changed my mind. He made me feel safe, he made me happy, and that made me even more sure than before that I wanted to sleep with him. Emily, 1934. I lost my virginity when I was 15 years old. It was with a guy friend that I spent a lot of time with and did physical things with, but we werent technically in a relationship. However, we were really good friends and I felt comfortable with him. Sex had been in the back of my mind for a while. I asked him about one month in advance if he wanted to do it with me, and he said yes. He had never had sex before, either. We used a condom, which he more than willingly agreed to do. Before we did it, I felt extremely nervous, but a good kind of nervous it was something I really wanted to do, I just didnt want to mess it up. Afterward, I honestly felt closer to him emotionally and physically, and I could tell he did too. Our relationship ended up becoming more serious and eventually we started dating for real. Amanda, 2335. I lost mine last year, when I was 19. The guy I lost it to was my first love. When we finally tried to have sex, it hurt unusually badly. We kept trying the whole night, but it just wasnt happening. I eventually found out I had cysts on my ovaries. We broke up about five months later. Afterwards, I thought I had wasted that special moment on someone who didnt deserve it. But now, Im grateful because that experience probably saved my life. We are on good terms now, so Im glad to say it wasnt a mistake. Rachel, 20Advertisement Continue Reading Below36. I was 19. It happened during a Netflix and chill situation and things were escalating pretty quickly. The guy I had been talking to didnt know I was a virgin, and I didnt tell him because I was afraid it would scare him off. Losing my virginity was quick and for the most part painless. It was no worse than period cramps. Once I got home, I felt guilty because it wasnt how I imagined losing my virginity, and not something you get back. I cried for a little bit and then decided there wasnt anything more I could do about it. I couldnt change what had already happened. All in all it wasnt terrible, and Im not sure I would change it. Kylie, 2037. I lost mine at 19 to my first boyfriend. I had wanted to wait until we had reached the sixmonth mark of our relationship, but it was about four and a half months into our relationship. It was on my bed in my dorm on a Sunday (which I remember because his dad is a pastor!) and it was actually totally fine. I had no pain, and it just felt right. He was gentle and it was loving. I knew I was ready because I just looked at him and wanted to be with him.The fact that he hadnt pressured me before helped, too. I remember whispering that I was ready, and he asked me twice before we actually did it if I was sure. We spent time after just cuddling and I felt so happy. Rachel, 2438. I was 21. Before then, I hadnt gone very far past first base. I dont necessarily know if I felt ready or if I just felt like it was about time I got this over with, but I was doing everything I could to find the right guy. After many, many failed dates, I met my first boyfriend at a film festival. He was cute, European, and really into me. Within a week, he was asking me to be his girlfriend. I didnt know how I felt about him, so I kept putting off becoming official. One day, we were fooling around and he asked to put on a condom. I was definitely into it, so I said, OK, I want to be your girlfriend now. Put on the condom. Even though we broke up later, he cared about me in the moment and thats all that mattered. Alex, 23Advertisement Continue Reading BelowAdvertisement Continue Reading Below39. I lost my virginity the summer I turned 20. I had just started the Pill and I was really afraid of getting pregnant and ruining my life, which was the message Id received growing up. I put a towel down. I wasnt afraid of what it would feel like mostly I was just afraid I wouldnt be good at it. Despite his efforts to the contrary, it hurt a lot. I just pushed through, thinking that eventually it would get better.The problem was, it never got better. Three years went by and sex still hurt. Several doctors later, I learned the culprit was a condition called endometriosis. With endo, the lining of your uterus grows in places it shouldnt, like your fallopian tubes, ovaries and sometimes elsewhere in your body. Theres no cure for endo and treatments are limited, but there are more ways to enjoy sex than just intercourse alone. Abby, 2440. I met a guy during summer orientation the weekend before I started college. We made out after an orientation party, then kept in touch through thousands of flirty texts all summer long. When we finally got to college, we spent hours hooking up every day. I kept hoping hed take me out on a date I wanted him to be my boyfriend but that never happened. After three weeks of him pressuring me to have sex, I finally felt ready. Thirty seconds after it was over, he got up, got dressed, and left. He ignored my texts, never spoke to me again, and avoided eye contact every time we ran into each other for the next four years. I was furious at him for being such a jerk, but at least I knew that any sexual encounter I had after that would be lightyears better by comparison. (And they were!) Maria, 2241. I was almost 21, I was (finally) in a relationship with a guy I was crazy about, and I knew I was as ready as Id ever be. I had waited to have sex because I wanted my first time to be with someone that cared about me and would be around to share not just the physical act, but the emotions that came with it as well. I was scared that sex would hurt, and that fear made me more tense, so even though I was happy to be sharing that intimacy with my partner, I couldnt really relax and it hurt a bit. Afterwards, I was relieved that Id finally gotten it over with, and didnt know if I would ever think sex was fun. In the next weeks I learned that our culture obsesses about making the first time perfect, but chances are that the second, third, fourth, etc. times will be so much better. Theres less subconscious pressure, and youll learn what feels good for you. Also, lube is probably something you want to have. Tori, 22Advertisement Continue Reading Below42. As a teenager, I tended to put sex on a pedestal as something thatd be magical. Luckily, I fell in love with a guy during my first semester of college. He had already had sex, but he was considerate and made me feel safe to call the shots for when I felt ready to do it together. So after a few months of dating, I planned a specific night for us where it was going to happen. I put on lingerie, we lit a candle the works. But after making such a big deal about the pageantry of sex, I ended up putting too much pressure on myself and couldnt relax when it came down to it. Nothing felt right, I couldnt get into the mood, and the act lasted seconds before I asked to stop. Later that week, during a comfortable Netflix date, I felt at ease and we tried again. It was so much better and enjoyable that second time and I didnt even have on matching underwear. Looking back, I wish I wouldve paid more attention to how I felt rather than how I thought the best situation for sex looked like. The best sex happens when youre comfortable and connected, not when youre posed and overly selfconscious. Anna, 2143. It was with my summer romance before I went to college and I was 18yearsold. After a month of dating we decided to lose our virginities to each other. I asked my mom if she would let me have the apartment for the night, weve always had open communication about sex, and she said yes. After a comedy show in NYC and dinner we came back to my place. It was a bit awkward since I had one of those bed frames with the desk underneath that you had to climb a ladder to get to the bed part. I was relaxed and felt comfortable with him so there wasnt any pain. We proceeded to try every position we could think of for the next four hours pretty sure at some point we look up a few on the internet. I always wondered why my mom lent me the apartment. I asked a year after and she said it was because she had been molested as a kid and she wanted my first sexual experience to be positive. Stacy, 20Hannah Orenstein is the assistant features editor at Seventeen.com. Follow her on Twitter and Instagram !Advertisement Continue Reading Below
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Credit: PAMELA N. MARTIN Getty ImagesAdvertisementIn BriefAutism in GirlsOne in 68 children in the U.S. is affected by autismbut new research suggests that current diagnostic methods overlook girls, meaning even more kids may be on the spectrum.Behavioral and preliminary neuroimaging findings suggest autism manifests differently in girls. Notably, females with autism may be closer to typically developing males in their social abilities than typical girls or boys with autism.Girls with autism may be harder to diagnose for several reasons, including criteria developed specifically around males and overlapping diagnoses such as obsessivecompulsive disorder or anorexia.When Frances was an infant, she was late to babble, walk and talk. She was three before she would respond to her own name. Although there were hints that something was unusual about her development, the last thing her parents suspected was autism. She was very social and a very happy, easy baby, says Kevin Pelphrey, Francess father.Pelphrey is a leading autism researcher at Yale Universitys worldrenowned Child Study Center. But even he did not recognize the condition in his daughter, who was finally diagnosed at about five years of age. Today Frances is a slender, lightly freckled 12yearold with her dads warm brown eyes. Like many girls her age, she is shy but also has strong opinions about what she does and does not want. At lunchtime, she and her little brother, Lowell, engage in some classic sibling squabblingMom, hes kicking me!Lowell, seven, received an autism diagnosis much earlier, at 16 months. Their mom, Page, can recall how different the diagnostic process was for her two children. With Lowell, it was a snap. With Frances, she says, they went from doctor to doctor and were told to simply watch and waitor that there were various physical reasons for her delays, such as not being able to see well because of an eye condition called strabismus that would require surgical treatment at 20 months. We got a lot of different random little diagnoses, she recalls. They kept saying, Oh, you have a girl. Its not autism.In fact, the criteria for diagnosing autism spectrum disorder (ASD)a developmental condition that is marked by social and communication difficulties and repetitive, inflexible patterns of behaviorare based on data derived almost entirely from studies of boys. These criteria, Pelphrey and other researchers believe, may be missing many girls and adult women because their symptoms look different. Historically the disorder, now estimated to affect one out of every 68 children in the U.S., was thought to be at least four times more common in boys than in girls. Experts also believed that girls with autism were, on average, more seriously affectedwith more severe symptoms, such as intellectual disability. Newer research suggests that both these ideas may be wrong.Many girls may, like Frances, be diagnosed late because autism can have different symptoms in females. Others may go undiagnosed or be given diagnoses such as attentiondeficithyperactivity disorder (ADHD), obsessivecompulsive disorder (OCD) and even, some researchers believe, anorexia. As scientists study how this disorder plays out in girls, they are confronting findings that could overturn their ideas not only about autism but also about sex and how it both biologically and socially affects many aspects of development. They are also beginning to find ways to meet the unique needs of girls and women on the spectrum.Its Different for GirlsScientists in recent years have investigated several explanations for autisms skewed gender ratio. In the process, they have uncovered social and personal factors that may help females mask or compensate for the symptoms of ASD better than males do, as well as biological factors that may prevent the condition from developing in the first place see The Protected Sex below. Research has also revealed bias in the way the disorder is diagnosed.A 2012 study by cognitive neuroscientist Francesca Happ of Kings College London and her colleagues compared the occurrence of autism traits and formal diagnoses in a sample of more than 15,000 twins. They found that if boys and girls had a similar level of such traits, the girls needed to have either more behavioral problems or significant intellectual disability, or both, to be diagnosed. This finding suggests that clinicians are missing many girls who are on the less disabling end of the autism spectrum, previously designated Aspergers syndrome.In 2014 psychologist Thomas Frazier of the Cleveland Clinic and his colleagues assessed 2,418 autistic children, 304 of them girls. They, too, found that girls with the diagnosis were more likely to have low IQs and extreme behavior problems. The girls also had fewer (or perhaps less obvious) signs of restricted interestsintense fixations on a particular subject such as dinosaurs or Disney films. These interests are often a key diagnostic factor on the less severe end of the spectrum, but the examples used in diagnosis often involve stereotypically male interests, such as train timetables and numbers. In other words, Frazier had found further evidence that girls are being missed. And a 2013 study showed that, like Frances, girls typically receive their autism diagnoses later than boys do.Pelphrey is among a growing group of researchers who want to understand what biological sex and gender roles can teach us about autismand vice versa. His interest in autism is both professional and personal. Of his three children, only his middle child is typical. Kenneth, Pelphrey jokes, has classic middlechild syndrome and complains that his siblings get away with murder because they can blame it on their autism.Pelphrey is now leading a collaboration with researchers at Harvard University, the University of California, Los Angeles, and the University of Washington to conduct a major study of girls and women with autism, which will follow participants over the course of childhood through early adulthood. The researchers want every bit of clinical information we can get because we do not know what we ought to be looking for, Pelphrey says. Consequently, they are also asking participants and family members to suggest areas of investigation because they know firsthand what is most helpful and most problematic.Girls in the study will be compared with autistic boys, as well as typically developing children of both sexes, using brain scans, genetic testing and other measures. Such comparisons can help researchers tease out which developmental differences are attributable to autism, as opposed to sex, as well as whether autism itself affects sex differences in the brain and how social and biological factors interact in producing gendertypical behaviors.Already Pelphrey is seeing fascinating differences in autistic girls in his preliminary research. The most unusual thing we keep finding is that everything we thought we knew in terms of functional brain development is not true, he says. Everything we thought was true of autism seems to only be true for boys. For example, many studies show that the brain of a boy with autism often processes social information such as eye movements and gestures using different brain regions than a typical boys brain does. Thats been a great finding in autism, Pelphrey says. But it does not hold up in girls, at least in his groups unpublished data gathered so far.Pelphrey is discovering that girls with autism are indeed different from other girls in how their brain analyzes social information. But they are not like boys with autism. Each girls brain instead looks like that of a typical boy of the same age, with reduced activity in regions normally associated with socializing. Theyre still reduced relative to typically developing girls, Pelphrey says, but the brainactivity measures they show would not be considered autistic in a boy. Everything were looking at, brainwise, now seems to be following that pattern, he adds. In short, the brain of a girl with autism may be more like the brain of a typical boy than that of a boy with autism.A small study by Jane McGillivray and her colleagues at Deakin University in Australia, published in 2014, provides behavioral evidence to support this idea. McGillivray and her colleagues compared 25 autistic boys and 25 autistic girls with a similar number of typically developing children. On a measure of friendship quality and empathy, autistic girls scored as high as typically developing boys the same agebut lower than typically developing girls.Pelphrey is finding that autism also highlights normal developmental differences between girls and boys. Sex hormones, he says, affect just about every structure you might be interested in and just about every process you might be interested in. Although boys generally mature much later than girls do, the differences in brain development appear to be quite bigfar larger than the differences in behavior.Masking AutismJennifer OToole, an author and founder of the Asperkids Web site and company, was not diagnosed until after her husband, daughter and sons were found to be on the spectrum. On the outside, she looked pretty much the opposite of autistic. At Brown University, she was a cheerleader and sorority girl whose boyfriend was the president of his fraternity.But inside, it was very different. Social life did not come at all naturally to her. She used her formidable intelligence to become an excellent mimic and actress, and the effort this took often exhausted her. From the time she started reading at three and throughout her childhood in gifted programs, OToole studied people the way others might study math. And then, she copied themlearning what most folks absorb naturally on the playground only through voracious novel reading and the aftermath of embarrassing gaffes.OTooles story reflects the power of an individual to compensate for a developmental disability and hints at another reason females with autism can be easy to miss. Girls may have a greater ability to hide their symptoms. If you were just judging on the basis of external behavior, you might not really notice that theres anything different about this person, says University of Cambridge developmental psychopathologist Simon BaronCohen. It relies much more on getting under the surface and listening to the experiences theyre having rather than how they present themselves to the world.OTooles obsessive focus on reading and finding rules and regularities in social life is far more characteristic of girls with autism than boys, clinical experience suggests. Autistic boys sometimes do not care whether they have friends or not. In fact, some diagnostic guidelines specify a disinterest in socializing. Yet autistic girls tend to show a much greater desire to connect.In addition, girls and boys with autism play differently. Studies have found that autistic girls exhibit less repetitive behavior than the boys do, and as the 2014 findings from Frazier and his colleagues suggest, girls with autism frequently do not have the same kinds of interests as stereotypical autistic boys. Instead their pastimes and preferences are more similar to those of other girls.Frances Pelphreys obsession with Disney characters and American Girl dolls might seem typical, not autistic, for example. OToole remembers compulsively arranging her Barbie dolls. Furthermore, although autism is often marked by an absence of pretend play, research finds that this is less true for girls.Here, too, they can camouflage their symptoms. OTooles behavior might have seemed like typical makebelieve to her parents because she staged Barbie weddings just like other little girls. But rather than imagining she was the bride, OToole was actually setting up static visual scenes, not story lines.Also, unlike in boys, the difference between typical and autistic development in girls may lie less in the nature of their interests than in its level of intensity. These girls may refuse to talk about anything else or take expected conversational turns. The words used to describe women on the spectrum come down to the word too, OToole says. Too much, too intense, too sensitive, too this, too that.She describes how both her sensory differencesshe can be overwhelmed by crowds and is bothered by loud noise and certain texturesand her social awkwardness made her stand out. Her life was dominated by anxiety. Speaking broadly of people on the spectrum, OToole says, There is really not a time when were not feeling some level of anxiety, generally stemming from either sensory or social issues.As she grew up, OToole channeled her autistic hyperfocus into another area to which culture frequently directs women: dieting and body image, with a big dollop of perfectionism. I used to have a spreadsheet of how many calories, how many grams of this, that and the other thing I could eat, she says. The resulting anorexia became so severe that she had to be hospitalized when she was 25.In the mid2000s researchers led by psychiatrist Janet Treasure of Kings College London began to explore the idea that anorexia might be one way that autism manifests itself in females, making them less likely to be identified as autistic. There are striking similarities in the cognitive profiles, says Kate Tchanturia, an eating disorder researcher and colleague of Treasures at Kings College London. Both people with autism and those with anorexia tend to be rigid, detailoriented and distressed by change.Furthermore, because many people with autism find certain tastes and food textures aversive, they often wind up with severely restricted diets. Some research hints at the connection between anorexia and autism: in 2013 BaronCohen and his colleagues gave a group of 1,675 teen girls66 of whom had anorexiaassessments measuring the degree to which they had various autism traits. The research found that women with anorexia have higher levels of these traits than typical women do.No one is suggesting that the majority of women with anorexia also have autism. A 2015 metaanalysis by Tchanturia and her colleagues puts the figure at about 23 percenta rate of ASD far higher than that seen in the general population. What all of this suggests is that some of the missing girls on the spectrum may be getting eating disorder diagnoses instead.Further, because autism and ADHD often occur togetherand because people diagnosed with ADHD tend to have higher levels of autism traits than typical people dogirls who seem easily distracted or hyperactive may get this label, even when autism is more appropriate. Obsessivecompulsive behavior, rigidity and fear of change also occur in both people with autism and those with OCD, suggesting that autistic females might also be hidden in this group.Double StandardsEven when young women are comparatively easy to diagnose, they still face many challenges in the course of developmentparticularly social ones. This was the case for Grainne. Her mother, Maggie Halliday, had grown up in a large Irish family and could see early on that her third child, Grainne, was different. I knew from when she was a couple of months old that there was something not right, Halliday says. She didnt like to be held or cuddled. She could make herself a dead weight and justyou couldnt pick her up.Although Grainnes IQ tests are in the low normal range, the results do not capture either her abilities or her disabilities well. Today the teenagers intense interests are boy bands and musical theater. Despite being extremely shy, she blooms on stage and loves to sing. The play shes in, when they deliver the script, within a week, she has everybodys part memorized and every song in the score memorized, Halliday says.Because of a genetic condition, Grainne is short: 47and a half, she insists. And although she is laconic and does not tend to initiate conversation, she is also bubbly and smiles frequently, clearly interested in connecting. She weighs what she does say very carefully. For example, when asked whether she thinks autistic girls are more social than boys with autism, Grainne says, Some might be, not wanting to generalize.Of course, adolescence is difficult for most kids, but it is especially challenging for autistic girls. Many can cope with the far simpler world of elementary school friendships, but they hit a wall with the mean girls of junior high and the subtleties of flirting and dating. Moreover, puberty involves unpredictable changes such as breast development, mood swings and periodsand there are few things that autistic people hate more than change that occurs without warning. She would like to have a boyfriendthats why she loves the boy bands, says Halliday, adding that she thinks Grainne may not understand what such a relationship would really mean.Unfortunately, the autistic tendency to be direct and take things literally can make affected girls and women easy prey for sexual exploitation. OToole herself was the victim of an abusive relationship, and she says the problem is endemic among women on the spectrum, particularly because so many are acutely aware of their social isolation. When you feel youre too difficult to love, youll love for crumbs, she says.In this way, autism may be more painful for women. Autistic people who do not seem interested in social life probably do not obsess about what they are missingbut those who want to connect and cannot are tormented by their loneliness. A study published in 2014 by BaronCohen and his colleagues found that 66 percent of adults with the milder form of ASD (socalled Aspergers) reported suicidal thoughts, a rate nearly 10 times higher than that seen in the general population. The proportion was 71 percent among women, who made up about one third of the sample.Until very recently, few resources have been available to help autistic girls through these difficulties. Now researchers and clinicians are starting to fill these gaps. For example, Rene Jamison, an assistant clinical professor at the University of Kansas Medical Center, runs a program in Kansas City called Girls Night Out. Aimed at helping affected girls navigate adolescence, it focuses on specific issues such as hygiene and dress. Although this emphasis might seem trivial or a concession to gender stereotypes, in fact, failing to address such superficial concerns can cause serious life problems and restrict independence.Even many highly intelligent girls on the spectrum have difficulties with washing their hair, wearing deodorant and dressing appropriately, Jamison says. Some of this behavior is linked to sensory issues other aspects of the problem are related to difficulty following the appropriate sequence of behavior when doing something you think is unimportant. When Grainne was in seventh grade, I had to tell her it was against the law not to wear a bra, Halliday says of her daughter, who found bras uncomfortable. Grainne also did not want to wear deodorantsaying, almost certainly accurately, that the boys smelled worse.The Girls Night Out group does fun activities, ranging from having manicures to playing sports. Typical girls who get school credit for volunteering provide mentoring and talk about boys and other issues the girls might not want to discuss with adults. One of the things that we really work on is getting them to try new things to figure out what they might like, Jamison says.In New York City, Felicity House, which its founders tout as the worlds first community center for women on the spectrum, opened in 2015. Funded by the Simons Foundation, it occupies several floors of a spectacular Civil Warera mansion near Gramercy Park and offers classes and social events so autistic women can get to know and support one another. Five of the autistic women who helped to found Felicity House met a few weeks before it opened to talk about life on the spectrum. Only two had been diagnosed as childrenone with Aspergers and another with what she said was ADHD with autistic tendencies. Of the other three women, two had struggled with depression before their diagnosis as adults.Emily Brooks, 26, is a writer studying for her masters in disability studies at City University of New York. She identifies as gender queer and believes gender norms cause many problems for people on the spectrum. She noted, to broad agreement, that boys are allowed far greater leeway to deviate from social expectations. If a guy does something that is considered socially inappropriate his friends may sometimes encourage some of those behaviors, she said, adding that teen girls will shut you down if you do anything thats different.Leironica Hawkins, an artist who has created a comic book about Aspergers, also has to contend with social cues about race. Its not just because Im a woman on the spectrum. Im a black woman on the spectrum, and I have to deal with social cues that other people can afford to ignore, she said. She added that she thought women are probably punished more for not behaving the way we should. Ive always heard women are socially aware to the needs of others, and thats not me, most of the time I feel like I get pressured to be that way.Because of these expectations, there is less tolerance for unusual behaviorand not just in high school. Many of the women report having difficulty keepingbut not gettingjobs, despite excellent qualifications. You can see that in a faculty meeting even at the highlevel academic departments, Yales Pelphrey says. The guys still get away with much, much more.As awareness of autism grows, women and girls are already increasingly likely to be diagnosed this generation clearly has significant advantages over those past. But much more research will need to be done to design better and more genderappropriate diagnostic tools. Perhaps in the interim, the experiences of women with autism should teach us to be more tolerant of socially inept behavior in womenor less tolerant of it in men. Either way, it is clear that a greater understanding of autism in girls is needed to recognize this condition. And in the process it could illuminate new facets of typical behavior and the way that gender shapes the social world.The Protected SexSimon BaronCohen, a professor of developmental psychopathology and director of the University of Cambridges Autism Research Center, has helped develop several of the major theories that are guiding current thinking about autism. One of these hypotheses, which he is continuing to test, is the extreme male brain theory, which first appeared in the literature in 2002. The idea is that autism is caused by fetal exposure to higher than normal levels of male hormones, such as testosterone. This occurrence shapes a mind that is more focused on systemizing (understanding and categorizing objects and ideas) than empathizing (considering social interactions and other peoples perspectives).In other words, autistic minds may be stronger in areas where male brains, on average, tend to have strengthsand weaker in areas where females, again, speaking broadly, are the superior sex. (When it comes to individuals, of course, these averages do not say anything about a particular man or womans ability or capacitynor do the differences necessarily reflect immutable biology rather than culture.)Numerous recent studies have supported BaronCohens idea. In 2010 he and his colleagues found that male fetuses exposed to higher levels of testosterone in amniotic fluid during pregnancy tend to grow up to have more autism traits. A 2013 study he coauthored, led by his Cambridge colleague MengChuan Lai, found that the brainscan differences seen in children with autism occurred most often in regions that tend to vary by gender in typical children.In 2015 BaronCohen and his colleagues published results of an analysis of a large group of amniotic fluid samples from Denmark that are linked to population registries of mental health. They found that in boys, having an autism diagnosis was linked with higher levels of fetal testosterone and various other hormones, but the first cohort tested had too few girls with autism, so they are analyzing later births to see if the same results will be found. Further evidence came from a large Swedish study, also published last year, that found a 59 percent increased risk of giving birth to a child with autism among women with polycystic ovary syndromean endocrine disorder involving elevated levels of male hormones.Few scientistsincluding BaronCohenthink that the extreme male brain theory is the whole story. A second idea emerges when looking at the typical strengths of women. If having female hormones and a femaletype brain structure increases the ability to read the emotions of others and makes social concerns more salient, it might take a greater number of genetic or environmental hits to alter this capacity to the level where autism would be diagnosed. This idea is known as the female protective hypothesis.Along these lines, several studies have shown that in families with affected daughters, there are higher numbers of mutations known as copynumber variations than there are in families where only boys are affected. A 2014 study by geneticist Sbastien Jacquemont of the University of Lausanne in Switzerland and his colleagues found that there was a 300 percent increase in harmful copynumber variants in females with autism, compared with males.If eitheror bothof these hypotheses is correct, then there will always be more boys than girls on the spectrum. I imagine that once were very good at recognizing autism in females, there will still be a male bias, BaronCohen says. It just wont be as marked as four to one. It might be more like two to one. M.S.This article was originally published with the title The Invisible Girls
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0 010 maddeyle NBA playoff heyecanSaliselere kadar blnebilen heyecan, oyun ii dinamikleri, atmosferi ve taraftar kltryle gnlmzde bambaka bir yeri var NBA playofflarnn.Heyecan dorua trmanrken,NBAyi dier basketbol liglerine kyasla bu kadar ayrcalkl yapan 10 maddeyi belirledik.1. Sahura kalkar gibi NBAye kalkmakniversite rencileri ya da henz kronik i bulma srelerinin ortasnda olan, mecazi olarak deil sahiden gecesini gndze katmlarn NBAyi yayla yayla takip edebildii bir gerek. Peki ya alanlar? alan NBA sevenler arasnda da fedakarlktan hi kanmayanlar var. zellikle final malarn takip edebilmek iin yllk izinlerini bu zamana denk getirenleri mi ararsnz, NBA malar iin kendini gece vardiyasna yazdranlar m, yoksa iyerinde uyuklama pahasna alarm geceye kurup malar izleyenleri mi2. Kaan Kural ve bir tomar dolusu hohohoTrkiyede basketbol denince Murat Murathanolu ile birlikte akla gelen isimlerden bir tanesi kesinlikle Kaan Kuraldr. Murat Murathanolu son dnemde daha ok Trkiye Basketbol ligi zerinde younlasa da, Kaan Kural iin NBA adeta bir yaam tarzdr. Ve hayatnn odak noktasna ald bu mthi sevgiyi de Trkiyede birok kiiye ma yaynlar srasnda yapt orijinal yorumlar ve kendine has kahkahasyla alamtr. Dolaysyla srf Kaan Kuraln esprileri ve verdii bilgiler iin bile sabahlamaya deecektir.3. NBAde son ddk almadan ma bitmezBasketbolun dier spor dallarndan en nemli fark, anlarn n planda olmas ve mcadelenin neredeyse hi bitmemesidir. Yani basketbolda ilk ddkle birlikte balayan mcadele, son saniye, hatta son saliseye kadar devam eder. Farkn ald malarda dahi, bir takmn 2025 say gerilerden oyuna yeniden ortak olma hikayesi, olduka rastlanlabilir bir durumdur.4. NBA rekabetin ovla bulumasdrGloballeen dnyada sporun baka bir rol olduu aikar. Yani artk basketbol, sadece basketbol deil. in ovu da oyunun bir paras oldu. ov deyince sadece oyun d grsel ve estetik gsterileri kastetmiyoruz, bu ova oyuncularn ma ierisindeki gsterili smalar, bloklar, inanlmaz lkleri dahil.5. NBA varsa her zaman bir hikaye vardrSporun doasnda onu cazip klan temel bir mihenk ta vardr: Hikaye. Bu hikayeye ulamada, mcadele ve rekabet yalnzca tamamlayc birer ara halini alyor. Her ey bu gzel, bu nceden kestirilemeyen hikayeleri yakalamak iindir. Msabakalar bu kadar heyecanl ve anlaml klan ey, tam olarak bu. te bu durum, NBA kitlesinin epey farknda olduu bir durum. 33 saniyede tek bana tam 13 say kaydederek ma takmna getiren Mc Gradynin direnii de bu hikayelerden biri. Bu kararllk, hrs, inan ve mcadelenin rzgar olduu saysz geri dn hikayesi NBAde, Avrupa ve dnya basketboluna oranla ok daha sk grlebiliyor.6. NBAde takmlar arasnda mutlak bir g fark yokturNBAde dier basketbol liglerinin aksine kmeye dmek yoktur. Bu durum, ikenin nne geerken uzun sreli yaplanmalara zemin hazrlyor. Dier taraftan yok olmak gibi endie verici duygulara izin vermeyerek, grselliin, estetiin, ksacas basketbol sanatnn daha rahat bir ekilde yaanmasna olanak salyor. te yandan ligi son srada bitiren takmlarn, bir sonraki sene daha gl bir takm kurabilmesi iin, Draft seimlerinde onlara avantaj salanyor, yani transfer ncelii veriliyor. Bu bakmdan NBAde hibir takmn mutlaka hegemonyasndan bahsetmek olanaksz. Bir sene ampiyon olan bir takm, bu dengeleyici e sayesinde, bir sonraki sene playofflara girmekte zorlanabilir. Bir sene ligi son srada bitiren takm, sonraki sene ampiyonlua oynayabilir.7. NBAde salonlar, takmlarnn baarsyla doru orantl dolmazlkemizde yerlemi bir spor kltr olmad iin ve dorudan sonu odakl bakld iin, izleyici mteri seyirci sfatlarndan ok, daha net bir tavrla taraftar olgusu n planda tutuluyor. Bu da spor msabakalarna olan ilginin sonularla ilgili olduu bir lkede, ligden erken kopan bir takmn, bu amaszl ierisinde yalnz braklmas anlamna geliyor. Oysa NBA liginde ehirler, basketbol takmlarna sonular ne olursa olsun btn bir sene boyunca destek vermeyi srdryor. Herhangi bir hedefi ya da iddias kalmasa bile, yerleik bir spor kltr olduu iin, taraftar duygusuyla deil de, bizzat o grsel ovun mterisi gibi de yaklaabiliyorlar. Hal byle olunca sonular, o kadar da nemli olmuyor. Elenmek, keyifli zaman geirmek, ligin btnne deil, o gnk msabakaya younlamak, temel yaklam.8. NBAdeki gururlarmzBirok Trk basketbolcu iin NBA arenasna dahil olmak kariyeri iin bir zirve nokta. Gen yalardan itibaren baz takmlarn draft listelerine dahil olan epey basketbolcumuz var. Fakat bunlarn sadece belli bir ksm NBAde uzun vadeli bir kariyer yapabildi ve tutunabildi. Mirsad Trkcan, bu adm atmay becerebilmi ilk Trk basketbolcu olarak tarihe geti. Hidayet Trkolu ve Mehmet Okur ise NBAde en uzun sre forma giyen basketbolculardan NBAde ksa bir macera geiren Semih Erden, brahim Kutluay dnda, mer Ak, Furkan Aldemir, Ersan lyasova, Enes Kanter gibi isimler u an kariyerine burada devam eden isimler arasnda.9. Yok artk LeBron JamesNBAde 20142015 normal sezonu geride kald. Nisan aynda balayan NBA playoff malarnn da artk son halkasna geldik. Dou birincisi Clevland ile Bat birincisi Golden State arasndaki byk mcadele perembeyi cumaya balayan gece, Sports Tvde 04.00 sularnda balyor. Bu byk seride Clevlandn en byk kozu hi phesiz LeBron James olacak. NBA kariyerine balad takm olan Clevlanda yeniden dnerek, onlar dip noktadan zirveye tayan ve takmn btn havasn ksa srede deitiren LeBron James, kariyeri boyunca ma bana yaklak olarak 28 sayyla oynuyor. Saha iersinde atletik yaps, inanlmaz kuvveti ve taraftarla olan iletiimiyle bu ovun en nemli paralarndan biri olan dev adamn neler yapabilecei merak konusu.10. Bir bacaksz sihirbaz: CurryNBAde uzun yllar boyunca ligin en dibine demir atm takmlardan biri olan Golden Statein gen basketbolcular artk bymeye balad. Takma gelen doru yan paralarla birlikte, mthi bir momentum tutturan, doru ve akc bir hcum basketbolu oynamay baaran Golden State, kukusuz bu senenin en iyi k yapan takm. Bu baarnn da mimar elbette kk sihirbaz Stephen Curry. Keskin zekas, serbest at atar gibi gnderdii lkleri, asistleri ve mthi liderliiyle Curry, NBA playoff heyecan konusunda deneyimliolan Lebronu epeyce zorlayacak gibi. Golden State kadrosunun tek handikap, hi phesiz bu seviyeleri ilk kez oynayan bir takm olmas. Yedinci maa kadar tanmas muhtemel bu mthi final serisi iin imdiden uyku plannz belirleyin.NBA playoffTE FNAL MALARININ PROGRAMI
Share this articleShareThe sex slaves who somehow escaped Islamic States clutches have told of how they were forced to marry fighters who physically and sexually abused them.It is not known whether the 19 women executed supposedly just a few days ago were Yazidis or not.They were put to death because they refused to participate in the practice of sexual jihad, a spokesman for the Kurdish Democratic Party in Mosul told Iraqi News .Said Mimousini also claimed issues around money and the distribution of women have caused a rift within ISISs ranks.In October, the terror group released a pamphlet which showed how much it charged for the purchase of its female captives.ISISS DESPICABLE PRICE LIST FOR YAZIDI AND CHRISTIAN SLAVESA translated version of the document (left) was shared online by humanitarian and peace prize winner Dr Widad Akrawi , and reads as follows:We have received news that the demand in Women and Cattle market has sharply decreased and that will affect Islamic State revenues as well as the funding of mujahideen in the battlefield, therefore we have made some changes. Below are the prices for Yazidi and Christian women.The price for Yazidi or Christian women between the age of 40 50 is 43 (27)75 (48) for 30 to 40yearolds86 (55) for 20 to 30yearolds130 (83) for ten to 20yearolds172 (110) for one to nineyearoldsCustomers are allowed to purchase only three items with the exception of customers from Turkey, Syria and Gulf countries.Dated and sealed by ISIS in Iraq October 16, 2014.Its authenticity was debated until April, when the UNs special envoy for sexual violence in conflict confirmed it was genuine during a trip to Iraq.Zainab Bangura told Bloomberg :The girls get peddled like barrels of petrol... One girl can be sold and bought by five or six different men.Sometimes these fighters sell the girls back to their families for thousands of dollars of ransom.The shocking document described the women it abducted as items and claimed a decrease in demand of women and cattle affected Islamic State revenues as well as the funding of mujahideen in the battlefield.It then gives the prices of women and children by age, with one to nineyearolds costing the most around 110. The older the women, the lower the price.Escape: ISIS stormed the Sinjar district (pictured in August) in northern Iraq last year and captured hundreds of women belonging to the Yazidi communityExodus: The Yazidi people (pictured in Sinjar last year) practice an ancient religion which is a mixture of Islam and Christianity and ISIS view them as hereticsThe pamphlet published on October 16 goes on to say: Customers are allowed to purchase only three items with the exception of customers from Turkey, Syria and Gulf countries.Bangura said the fighters get to choose first and then wealthy MiddleEasterners are allowed toThe UN envoy has previously said the best looking Yazidi virgins are sent to depraved slave auctions in Islamic States adopted capital of Raqqa in Syria, where they are stripped naked and sold to the highest bidder.They have a marriage bureau which organizes all of these marriages and the sale of women... They have a price listShe said Islamic State, which controls over four million people living inside its territory in Iraq and Syria, is unlike any other terror group.Bangura added: They ISIS have a machinery... They have a manual on how you treat these women. They have a marriage bureau which organizes all of these marriages and the sale of women... They have a price list.An ISIS video released in November last year appeared to show an ISIS sex slave market where fighters can choose among different Yazidi girls who are priced according to desirable physical features.Since then, several women who managed to escape their abusive captors have told of the pain and suffering they endured under ISIS rule.Only last month, three Yazidi women who were forced to become jihadi said they were raped five times a day after being traded as human cargo.Twisted: An ISIS video released in November last year appeared to show an ISIS sex slave market where excited fighters bargained over Yazidi sex slavesThe young women Bushra, 21, Munira, 17, and Noor, 22 were tied up, gang raped and burnt with cigarettes after being forced to marry ISIS fighters. Their names have been changed to protect their identity.After escaping Iraq, the women were flown to the UK by international charity AMAR, which helps people rebuild their lives following conflict.Bushra, who tried to kill herself when she was sold to an ISIS extremist, said: The man who had bought me took me to hospital.He raped me about five times a day... My sister was barely 14 when they raped her... I could hear her screaming but I couldnt do anything as I was tied upBushra, former Yazidi sex slaveHe told me he was going to rape me that same day, however ill I made myself. He took me home, tied up my hands and feet, and raped me.He raped me about five times a day. My sister was barely 14 when they raped her... I could hear her screaming but I couldnt do anything as I was tied up.Thousands of women and girls from the Yazidi community an ancient Kurdish ethnic group based in the north of Iraq have had their lives shattered by ISIS fighters, Amnesty International has said.The organisation says hundreds, and possibly thousands, have been forced to marry, sold or given as gifts to Islamic State fighters or their supporters and many held as sexual slaves are girls younger than 14.Amnestys researcher Donatella Rovera spoke to more than 40 women who were fortunate enough to escape ISIS captivity in Iraq.She discovered that some of these abused women and girls were so severely and irreparably traumatised that they have been driven to end their own lives.Read more:
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